Political Philosophy
PHL 265
Fall 2023
Guidance for Writing the Papers
1
INTRODUCTION
• Thesis Statement: DO give a thesis statement. You should be able to sum up the
main idea or conclusion of your paper in one or two sentences. If you are writing
an expository paper, you might tell the reader what you regard as the writer’s one
or two most important ideas that you will be discussing, or how one idea helps
understand a second. If the paper will include your critical discussion, tell us what
your main conclusion is.
• If it helps, imagine that a newspaper editor read your essay and needed to
come up with a short headline for it –e.g., “Plato’s Philosopher King: Not
as Crazy as it Sounds.” Then use that to build up your thesis statement.
• Roadmapping: In an essay that does a couple of things—e.g., considers the views
of Aristotle, Hobbes, and then offers the author’s own view—it is often a good idea
to tell the reader how you will be proceeding in your paper by giving a short
roadmap of what you are going to say (a sentence or two). This can sometimes
overlap with the thesis statement. In a very short paper (3 pages or less), this may
not be necessary.
• Skip the Fluff: Because these are short papers, DON’T begin with background
information. For instance, you don’t need to tell the reader that Aristotle was a
great philosopher. In short papers, most of the introduction should usually either
be taken up with stating the thesis statement or explaining the structure of the
paper.
ARGUMENT
• Target Audience: Whenever you write, you should think about who your target
audience is. In this case, think of yourself as writing for your classmates: other
students who have done the reading, but who may not have thought as carefully
about these particular issues as you have. More precisely, you should think of
your audience as composed of people who are interested in the topic and who are
open-minded, but who are not necessarily predisposed to agree with you. Even
though you are writing for your classmates, you should not assume that they
remember everything that is said in the texts. If you refer to an idea or argument,
you should remind your readers of it by explaining it to them, maybe offering a
short quotation, and always citing the relevant part of the text.
• How it all hangs together (or doesn’t): You don’t want to merely tell the reader
what the author’s conclusion is. You want to explain the reasons and assumptions
2
that lie behind that position as much as possible. In contrast to the material you
encounter in some philosophy classes, it may not always be particularly helpful to
try to reconstruct a premise-by-premise argument for our authors (though
sometimes it is!). But you should try to explain, as far as possible, the assumptions
the author is making, how one part of his or her view implies another, how certain
ideas hang together, and so on.
By the same token, if you think that there are certain inconsistencies or tensions
in the author’s view, then those are great things to bring out as well.
 The philosopher Wilfred Sellers famously said that “The aim of philosophy,
abstractly formulated, is to understand how things in the broadest possible
sense of the term hang together in the broadest possible sense of the
term.” If you are not explaining how an author thinks different ideas “hang
together” (or exploring how the author’s ideas actually fail to hang
together) then you are not doing the assignment correctly. Philosophy is
large part about studying the structural relation between ideas.
• Selectiveness and Concision: Because this is a short paper, you are going to have
to be selective in what you include in your paper and concise in your manner of
explaining it. Focus on what you judge to be the most important ideas.
• Citing the text: Be sure you engage closely with the text. When you refer to
something an author says, even if you do not directly quote it, you should cite the
page number, or paragraph, or section number, etc. (depending on the text). This
way, if the reader is skeptical of your interpretation, it is easy for him to check
which part of the text you are basing your reading on.
• Citation style: The best way cite for the purposes of our course is to use simple
parenthetical citations at the end of your sentences. Footnotes of the same basic
form are fine. Citations do not count toward the word limit.
 Citations should always be reasonably specific. For example, (Politics II.2)
is helpful; to simply cite (Politics) is not.
 For some texts, citing the page number is best. This is especially true if we
are using the original printing (e.g., the contemporary works at the end of
the semester) or if the chapters or sections are quite long.
 For some texts, however, there are other more convenient ways of citing
them. With Aristotle, I would cite book and chapter number—e.g., (Politics
II.2). For Hobbes, I would cite the chapter and paragraph number—e.g.,
(Leviathan XVII.3). For Locke’s Second Treatise, you can just cite the
section number (Second Treatise s. 14).
 It will usually be obvious who the author is, so you don’t need to put the
author’s name in the citation. However, for some of our contemporary
works, the titles are rather bulky. In that case, it would be more
convenient to either invent an abbreviation or use the last name and
3
publication date—e.g., (DJSA 52) or (Rawls 1968: 52), not (“Distributive
Justice: Some Addenda” 52).
 In general, just use common sense. Since most of our readings are my own
selections, we aren’t going to be real fussy about this, as long as we can
understand what the citation is.
• Direct Quotations: Direct quotations from the author can be appropriate, but
should not be overused. A paper without any direct quotations probably isn’t
engaging closely enough with the text. On the other hand, the danger of
employing too many quotations is that you will use them as a crutch: instead of
explaining what an author says, you simply reproduce their own words. Such a
paper is unlikely to further enlighten or persuade someone who has already read
the texts you are discussing. Furthermore, without explaining an author’s
argument in your own words, it is not clear that you really have a grasp of its main
ideas. Long quotations of two or more sentences should be used very sparingly if
at all.
When should you use direct quotations? Without aspiring to give you an
exhaustive list, here are three good reasons:
(1) If you think your readers might be skeptical that the author really says
what you are attributing to her, then quoting the author’s own words can
be useful as evidence.
(2) If you feel like a particular statement warrants extensive comment or
interpretation. It is often a good idea to directly quote what you think is
the author’s central claim, and then explain what that claim means and
doesn’t mean. Or perhaps you think the statement is ambiguous and you
want to show two ways of interpreting the statement.
(3) If a particular statement that the author makes is really emblematic of
the idea you have been attributing to him. For example, perhaps you
have spent the whole paragraph explaining a particular concept. You
might want to end the paragraph with a sentence that sums it all up in a
few words. (E.g., “Thus, as Aristotle says, ‘SHORT DIRECT QUOTE’)
• Coherence of Paragraphs: Make sure that every paragraph has a main point, that
it is clear to the reader what that main point is, and that every sentence in the
paragraph contributes to making that main point. For this reason, it is a good rule
of thumb to start paragraphs with topic sentences that state the main idea of the
paragraph.
• Overall Essay Organization: Make sure that the role of each paragraph in the
larger argument is clear. Sometimes you need to do more than make your point;
you need to explain why you’re making the point that you’re making and how it
fits in with the rest of your essay.
4
Although short papers (e.g., 3 pages or less) probably shouldn’t have section
headings, it is fine to use them for somewhat longer essays to help organize the
different parts. Just make sure that the final product reads like a coherent essay
and not a series of short essay responses. Just to give one example, you might
have headings like: INTRODUCTION, ARISTOTLE, HOBBES, DISCUSSION.
Sometimes, to forge a connection between two ideas, it can help to introduce a
paragraph with a summary of the preceding and a rhetorical question. E.g., “I have
said that Aristotle thinks that the city is prior to the individual, but does that mean
that Aristotle thinks that the individual is just like the part of a body?” This device
should be used selectively, however; it would be tedious if you used it time and
time again.
• Your own view: The following is only relevant to assignments that ask you to
explain your own view. An important part of doing philosophy is thinking about
whether you find particular arguments persuasive or not and the reasons you have
for making this judgment. Note that we are not really looking for your “personal
opinion.” What we are interested in are the reasons why you find one view more
persuasive than another – reasons that could persuade the reader to adopt your
view. That you enjoyed reading Hobbes more than Locke, because Hobbes is a
better writer is not the kind of thing we are looking for. A very general claim, like
Hobbes’s reasoning seems more logical than Aristotle’s, is not very good either.
More appropriate would be, for example, that you find that Hobbes has a more
persuasive view about the causes of conflict.
 Your position does not have to be unqualified. Perhaps you agree with one
text in some ways, another text in other ways.
• Conclusion: Conclusions can be hard to write, especially for short papers. Here is
what I suggest.
 In a short expository paper, just skip the conclusion.
 In a longer essay that has multiple parts, briefly remind the reader what
you have accomplished in your paper. What are the most important
questions have you answered, and what are the main points that you have
made?
 You can also add thoughts that look beyond the content of the paper. Are
there further implications of your argument that you haven’t had the
chance to consider?
 You can also qualify your argument, by noting that although you think that
the arguments that you have made are valid, that perhaps there is
something to be said even still for the other side.
 In general, don’t spend a lot of space on the introduction or conclusion.
Both should be relatively brief so that you can spend most of your time on
the body of your paper. Papers often go wrong by spending too much time
5
on introductions and conclusions; they rarely go wrong when they are too
short.
STYLE
• Philosophers usually write in the first person, since you are trying to present your
own reasoning. It is perfectly appropriate to write, “Hobbes’s argument isn’t
persuasive to me. Here’s why: …” or “As I see it, Aristotle is best interpreted as
saying…” That said, it is best to avoid phrases like, “In my personal opinion…”
which makes it sound like you don’t want to try to give reasons for your view. This
last point needs one qualification. Sometimes reasons give out. If you just don’t
feel the pull of the fundamental claim that—e.g., everyone has certain natural
rights of liberty—then you can express that perspective. For example, “I find that
I simply cannot accept that there are any natural rights. As I see it, all claims about
rights can only be referred to a considerations of the general welfare.”
• Part of university writing is expanding your vocabulary, but students often get into
trouble by trying to use sophisticated-sounding words which just make their
writing unclear. You don’t need to impress the reader with jargon. Just write in a
way that makes sense to you.
• Contractions are fine.
• For those who are not native English-speakers: We do not penalize for non-
idiomatic English. That is, you aren’t going to get a lower grade because we can
tell that English is not your first language. However, the same standards of clarity
apply to all. We need to be able to understand what you are saying if we are going
to evaluate the substance of what you say. Obviously, this is harder if English is
not your first language, but your achievements in a class like this are all the more
impressive for that reason.
REFERENCES
• If you are simply using the texts I have provided, then you don’t need to add
bibliographic information.
• If you refer to other editions of our works, do include bibliographic information.
(And, by the way, if you are using another edition of a text, it is all the more
important to cite the text using section or paragraph numbers where possible,
since the reader may not have the page numbers you are listing.)
• You are discouraged from using any external sources, but if you do use them, you
should cite them and provide bibliographic information.
• If you have bibliographic references, you can put them in footnotes or in a works
cited page at the end.
• For the most part, I discourage any external research, since it is likely to distract
you from analyzing the arguments in the texts assigned. However, you will not be
6
penalized for doing external research, so long as you fully cite whatever sources
you borrow text or ideas from. Failure to acknowledge your sources constitutes
plagiarism. All of this being said, a paper that relies too heavily on external sources
will often show less original thought, perhaps less engagement with the primary
source material. Therefore, using external sources can indirectly lower your mark
by making it a weaker paper.
• One important exception to the rule of thumb against using sources not assigned
in this class is that you may feel that something you have read previously is
relevant to your discussion. For example, perhaps you have read another
philosopher in another class, and you want to refer to some of his or her ideas. Or
maybe you want to refer to a news story that directly bears on your topic. This is
perfectly appropriate; just make sure you cite whatever you use.
• You do not need to cite the lectures or things said in discussion section; we can
regard these as the common intellectual property of the whole class.
HOW WILL MY PAPER BE MARKED? Here are some things that we will look for when we
mark:
• Clarity: Is the paper written clearly? We cannot assess the substance of what you
have written if we do not understand it. Moreover, clear writing is a general skill
of as much value outside the classroom as in it When we grade, we cannot
constantly be giving you the benefit of the doubt; we cannot keep thinking, “Well,
there is a possible way of construing that sentence that makes it sort of correct.”
Such papers will naturally receive lower marks than papers which make very clear
statements which are not easily misunderstood. Of course, we won’t willfully
misunderstand you, but you should write not so that you could be understood,
but so that you cannot (reasonably) be misunderstood.
• Organization: Closely related to clarity, we will ask: Does the paper have a logical
structure? Is there some point that the paper is trying to make (or is it just a loose
collections of thoughts)? Does the reader have to work really hard to figure out
that structure, or does the writer make that structure clear to the reader?
• Grasp of Basic Ideas: Does the student demonstrate familiarity with the text?
Does the writer show that she understands the main points made by the authors?
It is not fatal to make small errors of interpretation, but we can usually tell when
you basically know what you’re talking about and when you don’t. One common
mistake is to latch onto one very small part of the text (often towards the
beginning), and then try to build up your entire interpretation from that. This
usually leads you to misunderstand the whole point that the author is making.
Also, many philosophers develop their own views by engaging with rival positions.
Make sure you don’t mistake the philosopher’s discussion of a rival position for
his statement of his own case.
7
• Engagement with the Text: Does the paper really engage with the texts, or does
it seem to have been written without really studying them? When attributing an
idea to an author, does the paper cite the relevant page or section number? Does
the paper effectively put arguments into its own words, rather than merely
quoting the text to avoid having to do so?
• Depth: Has the paper dug deeply into the issues (given the constraints of space)
or has it proceeded at a superficial level? Does the paper consider objections to
its interpretations or arguments? Does it give serious consideration to other
points of view? Is the paper convincing in answering these objections? A paper
that is otherwise very competent but which never digs into the issues in any depth
is usually a ‘B’ or ‘B+’ paper.
• Originality and Insight: Does the paper demonstrate independent and creative
thinking? Or is the paper simply regurgitating what was said in lecture or
discussion section? Of course, it is perfectly appropriate to use points made in
lecture or discussion section as jumping-off points, but a really good paper will
add new thoughts to these or consider these points from new angles. A paper
that is otherwise excellent but shows little or no original thinking is usually a ‘B’ or
‘B+’ paper.
Originality, in this context, does not mean that you have come up with an idea
that no one has ever come up with before. It simply means that you have added
something to what we have presented to you in lecture or tutorial. If you have
been attentive in class and find yourself discovering something new while writing,
that is an excellent sign! If you feel like you are simply regurgitating material from
lecture or tutorial, that is not so good.
HOW CAN I GET HELP?
• First, your TA will be holding special office hours to discuss the paper before the
paper is due—typically the TA will meet with several students at a time. Your TA
will make these hours known to you. As a general rule, the more you have
thought about how to write the paper, the more your TA will be able to help you.
• You are encouraged to have your classmates, friends, or whomever proofread
your work and give you comments. It is essential, however, that you do any
actual writing. Proofreaders may help you rewrite a couple of sentences as an
illustration, but it is not permissible for the proofreader to rewrite large sections
of the paper.
• Do not use ChatGPT or other AI tools for generating text. This is strictly
forbidden. I also discourage using them even for proofreading a completed
8
essay – after all, if we all use ChatGPT to polish our writing, we are all going to
end up with exactly the same style. Boring!
• You are also highly encouraged to utilize available writing centres. Typically
these require you to already have a draft ready to discuss.
The Philosophy Essay Clinic:
(Especially recommended. You need to book ahead, and it may not be available at the
beginning of term.)
https://philosophy.utoronto.ca/st-george/undergraduate-at-st-george/philosophy-essay-clinic/
St. George Campus Writing Centres
http://www.writing.utoronto.ca/writing-centres/arts-and-science
Writing Centre Workshops
http://www.writing.utoronto.ca/writing-plus
Finally, English Language Learners may find additional resources at:
http://www.writing.utoronto.ca/faqs/english-as-second-language
http://www.artsci.utoronto.ca/current/advising/ell